the new kid among newish kids

Part of an ongoing series on the "why" behind The Summer Camp Project. Full story here → Our Story

I went to three different elementary schools. My bio mom somehow managed to keep our childhood mostly consistent. I do remember each move being disruptive. In 6th grade, we landed in a cockroach-infested apartment, where my brothers and I made a game of who could kill the most cockroaches as soon as we flipped the lights on. No matter how often we asked the apartment to spray or fog the place, the vermin would return in greater force. We’d be displaced for 4-6 hours between prep, fogging, ventilation, and cleanup. We couldn’t wait to move out of that apartment.

August 2002 was when I’d start at the new school, Juan Seguin High School on Silo Road in Arlington, TX.

Because it was a new school, the social hierarchy that existed was because most of the students came from the other high school 10 minutes away. I had come from another school 20 minutes away. But we were all in a new place, which meant we were all starting out again and establishing new traditions, a rare experience where every kid at that school was the new kid.

Because we were all new kids sophomore year, the potential to make friends worked in our favor.

The founding principal, Mr. Ed Farmer, who was a Navy Seal, would recite our school motto “Where Excellence is the Standard.”

I’d run into Ms. Barr, who was my speech and debate coach from junior high. She was the Ms. Frizzle look-alike, which gave the new experience a storybook quality. She was somewhat an anchor in unfamiliar territory.

That summer before, my adopted mom Tammy and I had prayed for a friend to come into my life. It was a missing part of the childhood constellation I referred to previously.

Sophomore year, I’d continue taking on a rigorous academic schedule, enjoying lunch time with my friends Terence and Jennifer, having a role as “lady in the box” at the inaugural fall play “Our Town” by Thornton Wilder, auditioning in the spring for the Starline Dance and Drill Team, and carrying around bags of lollipops to fundraise for my passage to summer camp.

Jennifer and I connected during sophomore year over a game of putt putt. We attended summer camp together the following summer, and she is still one of my best friends to this day after two decades. Having classes and lunch together was nice, but doing activities outside of school together, and camp — getting to just be kids and explore — is what elevated the friendship.

Starting out again wasn’t as bad as I thought; it opened me up to new friendships. Every new start since seemed to reveal something in me I hadn't met yet.

That year taught me what it feels like when belonging finally shows up. Summer Camp Project exists because I've watched too many kids wait for that feeling and never get it — camp is where I try to make sure they don't have to wait as long as I did.